Wednesday, January 16, 2013

HOW TO STOP GOSSIP

If you don't make it any further I am posting these positive DOs if you happen to have a hard time with gossip. It is an unhealthy pass time, mostly spiritually but that effects every aspect of a person.

For the habit of GOSSIP--
  •  Replace this bad habit with a good one. SO - -
  •  Do kindnesses in secret.
  • Target someone and say some nice things about them instead of finding or listening to the negative.
  • Make a new practice of building people up rather than tearing them apart. 
  • Adding a very important point. Get away from hanging with a group of gossips.  Bad company corrupts good morals. Integrity is very important and worth the self discipline.
At work there are about 50 women in my department. We do not deal with the public, we deal with each other. This has proven to be an education in itself. Before this job I had never been around so many other females on a regular basis! Even with adults little clicks are formed and there are even office bullies! It has been interesting to me as one who observes human beings in social and family settings to see how some of my fellow cube dwellers behave concerning each other. Lately I have had some in your face dealings with a woman who operates like she is still in jr high school with the different people she interacts with at work. The most irritating thing she does is to constantly talk about other people in an unkind, negative way.

~~Our office is very busy and people walk through with business in our department from other departments and if she is not engaged in work she will have to make a snide comment or slide her eyes around concerning them in an insulting way. You may remember what I am talking about from jr high school nonsense. If the person who walks by could see her it would be insulting to say the least. This mid-forties teen understands the power gossip has to gather friends/associates about her. She wields stealthily the power of a rumor and she certainly and proudly professes her ability. I have personally received her threat for a rumor to be started if you get my drift. I am not concerned. Why? Because I now WHO has my back. It's supernatural!
~~The story of hers that drove me to my supervisor's office was about someone who I know very well and has for the past year been down and out. I won't go into the details of her life except to say she needs compassionate support from friends.  But I have learned from the rumor mill cube dweller that there really are people who see those who are down and out merely as golden opportunities to mill.

~~These kinds of people are really bullies if you think about it. Choosing the weakened down and out to mill about. Ugh!

~~I want to tell you, I was very open and specific with my supervisor in telling her I had not a notion how to deal further with The Gossip Mill. I had of course stood up for my friend and had plenty to say which countered the Rumor Mill herself in front of her hungry listeners, mouths gaping like hungry birds.

~~I have said all this because I know there are plenty of women who love a juicy story. They love to gossip.

~~I saw a pack of dogs one time that had awakened me with much barking in our back yard. Our back yard where our bunny happily lived in a well built rabbit hutch.Those trespassing dogs were ripping and tearing our defenseless and innocent bunny. They all tugged him to pieces. It was a horrible, terrorizing frenzy that I have never forgotten. That is what a group of gossiping women remind me of in their mindless gossip frenzy. If they are not ripping someone's character to shreds that isn't present then they are airing personal details that should be kept in confidence and only discussed in counsel. I despise it. Some do it so easily that snide remarks and criticism flow like hot vomit from their volcanoe burping up at a moments notice seemingly involuntary. A knee jerk reflex. What a very nasty kind of orgy.

~~To those readers who find themselves in this category I would ask, Is this the good thing to do? NO! Find positive ways to express who you are and positive ways to vent. Find positive ways to pass time and communicate with friends and family.  Just find the good thing to do and do it!


  •  Replace this bad habit with a good one.
  •  Do kindnesses in secret.
  • Target someone and say some nice things about them instead of finding or listening to the negative.
  • Make a new practice of building people up rather than tearing them apart. 
  • Adding a very important point. Get away from hanging with a group of gossips. Bad company corrupts good morals. Integrity is very important and worth the self discipline.
~~I am happy to report that the Rumor Mill after some repercussions has taken to mostly reading during  breaks rather than milling. However, I did catch her sliding eyes as I passed between her and a new kid on the block today at work. I pray that as I just go about finding the good thing to do that this young lady will see the Rumor Mill for what it is and I pray we all do as well. I have faith in prayer.

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